Lyrics

JUST BLOOD

I can see
My own maker laughing at me
I can’t feel
I’m not real and this isn’t happening
I can taste
The blood in your words and the heat in your hate
I can see
My own maker laughing at me

It’s just blood after all
It’s just blood after all

I’m left with nothing but artifacts
Failing to attach to intangible
The anatomy of abandonment
I’m dissecting it
Finding nothing

I can see
The sand of time fall fast before me
I can’t feel
The love you give is blind with hypocrisy
You remain
A shadow shared a vessel for your shame
I can see
My own maker laughing at me

I’m left with nothing but artifacts
Failing to attach to intangible
The anatomy of abandonment
I’m dissecting it
Finding nothing

Blistered by these boiling tears
I’ll tarnish all those golden years
Swallowed whole by shallow fear
I’ll tarnish all those golden years
Blistered by these boiling tears
I’ll tarnish all those golden years
Tarnish all those golden years
Tarnish all those golden years
Tarnish all those golden years

I’m left with nothing but artifacts
Failing to attach to intangible
The anatomy of abandonment
I’m dissecting it
Finding nothing

I’m left with nothing but artifacts
Failing to attach to intangible
The anatomy of abandonment
I’m dissecting it
Finding nothing

KILLING TIME

There’s a blind man walking with fire in his eyes
There’s a blind man walking with fire in his eyes
Can you see him now a loose grip on your mind
There’s a life worth living running out of time
There’s a coward on the run form a red hot lie
Grinding at the bit and crashing at a bright white line
There are flowers blooming through a cold goodbye
Whirring silver lining in the hurricane’s eye

There’s a blind man walking with fire in his eyes
And the boy with a vision won’t be free until he dies
Syncopated rhythm regimented lies
Killing yourself, You’re just killing time

There is cold blood running through a bright blue stream
There are blind eyes shifting through a lucid dream
There are fears you’re hiding flashing through your teeth
Dark memories tugging at a fraying sleeve
See the surface breaking more fragile than it seems
Watch the big hand crawling toward the hour of sleep
Hear the road of silence through an empty scream
Can you see him now dark shadow in a dream
There’s a blind man walking with fire in his eyes
And the boy with a vision won’t be free until he dies
Syncopated rhythm regimented dies
Killing yourself, just killing time

There are gods heard grieving in the cold vast skies
There are phantoms lurking in the pit of night
There are wild horses swimming in the sea
Running for the moon and crashing through a neon reef
There are lost worlds crying at the edge of time
There is fire burning for the heart unkind
Rolling golden waters for the hungry mind
Bursting through the seeds and cutting through the bitter rind

There’s a blind man walking with fire in his eyes
And the boy with a vision won’t be free until he dies
Syncopated rhythm, regimented lies
Killing yourself, you’re just killing time
Killing yourself, you’re just killing time

LIBERATOR

Cherry cheeks in bloom I see
Glitter off the black birds wings
Dancing along your laugh lines
My heart sings,”Luckiest still am I”
Lovelier than the night
Kissing the love in your eyes

Love is a lens through which I see I’m worthy, holding on tight
Love liberator mend me, patient and kind
Love is a skin that fits me, dress me in the light
Love liberator, I’m yours, take me when you like

Ruby red grapefruit seeds
Bursting at the core of me
A gift is every breath you breathe
Blunted knife to velveteen
Don’t ever change for me
You glow the most unchained and free

Love is a lens through which I see I’m worthy, holding on tight
Love liberator mend me, patient and kind
Love is a skin that fits me, dress me in the light
Love liberator, I’m yours, take me when you like

You, the note that makes my heart sing
Brushing dust from old burnt wings
At my core the ambient ring
“I love you” a constant, welling spring
Marigolds and cherry tree
You hold every bloom in me

REVOLVING DOOR

I, falling away from the world that I’ve known
Scratching and crawling I’ve fallen so low

I, itching and anxious
buried alive by the things that sustained us
Leave me alone.

I, cut and bleeding
Wasted away on the fears that you’re feeding
I’m losing my mind
I, dream of a world where I feel alive
You can’t hurt me this time
Not this time

Terrible dream, Rip me to pieces
I can’t die and I can’t wake up
Laughing at me like I deserve it
I can’t die and I can’t wake up
Petrified I’m losing myself
I can’t die and I can’t wake up
Your knife in me in the waking world
I can’t die and I can’t wake up

Round and round and round in your revolving door
You don’t know me and I don’t know myself anymore
Cracked and weary, this can’t be love
I’ve stepped into a room I can’t get out of
Round and round and round in your revolving door

Not safe in skin that’s not your own
Not safe in sleep in haunted homes
Not safe from you, shallow and weak
Not safe from you and the lies you keep
Your face as changed from one I’ve know
To foreign as a stranger and cold as stone
Not safe in skin that’s not your own

Round and round and round in your revolving door
You don’t know me and I don’t know myself anymore
Cracked and weary this can’t be love
I’ve stepped into a room I can’t get out of
Round and round and round in your revolving door
The love I had is tired and broken
Your chains on me that split me open
Round and round and round in your revolving door
Round and round and round and round and round

BAPTISM

Hand of the father
Holy, heavy, low
All white waters
I’m buried and sinking slow
Breathe toward heaven
Heart stop, dark unknown
Take his hands off me
Let me die alone

Screaming, dying, over and over again
Screaming, dying over and over again
All the evil in the world in the palm of a child’s hand
Screaming, dying, over and over again

Hand of the father
He won’t let me go
Choke down water
He can’t make me whole
No safety in sleep
Take the child home
Take his hands off me
Let me die alone

Screaming, dying, over and over again
Screaming, dying, over and over again
All the evil in the world in the palm of a child’s hand
Screaming, dying, over and over again

DEATH OF AUTONOMY

Laughing in the mirror at you, look me in the eye
Smiling through crocodile’s teeth, a vacant host
Cutting glass with a cold word
Stains in the flowers, weeds and the floorboards
Chasing a light shining bright as a daydream
Caught in the wake of the absurd

Pages and pages
Hammer and the anvil
Cutting the wings off a white bird
Based on stories and tall tales you once heard
Archaic nonsense
Burning the world down
Ten times over, ten times over
Breaking your back, your neck and your shoulders
Death of Autonomy

Tearing and tearing, ripping out the sutures
Bleeding out on a dead world
Wretched and reeling, grinding and screaming
Wringing the neck of a songbird

Pages and pages
Hammer and the anvil
Cutting the wings off a white bird
Based on stories and tall tales you once heard
Archaic nonsense
Burning the world down
Ten times over, ten times over
Breaking your back, your neck and your shoulders
Death of Autonomy….

AMATEUR PREDATOR

Paranoid, I can see the ghosts behind your eyes
Destroyed, I can see the fear you try to hide
You say, I like it best the blind way
But I see, A certain shade of misery
Your shame, Like armor on a red day
But I saw, A crack in your glass jaw
Amateur Predator, One dimensional hell hole
So quick to flay the whip, So safe in your houses
Your locked doors, Your dead mind
You’d die for, Man Unkind
So unsafe, To think twice
Remorseless, Man Unkind
Manunkind, Roll the dice, On my life
Manunkind, Gut the earth, And bid the poor to do your work
Manunkind, Devalue me, Use your shame like chains to bind me,
Manunkind, Sanctify, The hate that eats your heart alive
Manunkind, Kings and Queens, Petty riches, noble nothing
Manunkind, Empty still, With nothing but your pain to kill

CHERRY BLUE

Plucking pears from Daphne’s Tree
With the Sirens singing you to sleep
Throwing coals where I can’t see
Anxiety and Ecstasy
Is there room enough for me
To stay still inside your memory
I’m stoned and stuck between
Anxiety and Ecstasy
Am I a fool to kiss a dream
In her aging arms Mnemosyne
Cut her down and count the rings
Anxiety and Ecstasy
Pink petal dreams alive
A golden oracle told
Of warm light I could hold
Of the peppermint in your smile,
How the doubt was put on trial
The sea is rich with stars
You sing into the hole inside my heart
With laughter opal bright
Old and hungry
Tired and empty
Bandage me in tender words
Kiss me like a hummingbird
All things silver and bronze
‘Till I took you on
Now I’m bathed in gold
All things shimmering new
You’re Cherry Blue
You’re a wish nine fold
Plucking pears from Daphne’s Tree
With the sirens singing you to sleep
Throwing coals where I can’t see
Anxiety and Ecstasy
Is there room enough for me
To stay still inside your memory
I’m stoned and stuck between
Anxiety and Ecstasy
Am I a fool to kiss a dream
In her aging arms Mnemosyne
Cut her down and count the rings
Anxiety and Ecstasy
Blue truth swims in your eyes
A depth I can’t deny
The world is ripe and deep
When I taste your Ecstasy

HYENA

Am I so Dismissible
Born with tape around my tongue
I am sick Of being patient
Waiting oh-so-kindly for my turn
In my fist
Are parted lips
Centuries of silence nevermore
And you…
You…
Your hubris made to crawl
When the Queen Hyena calls
Too many years of my life spent
Trying to make sense of your arrogance
This is not a request
Now shut up and listen
My pain is petty and voiceless
‘Till you find a way to exploit it
This is not a request
Now shut up and listen
Pontificate all you fucking want
The script of the heart reads ever on
This is not a request
Now shut up and listen
Perhaps you’re beginning to comprehend
The years of my breath that I’ve wasted on
Self Important Men
And you…
You…
Your hubris made to crawl
When the Queen Hyena calls
(Chorus Repeats)

HEIRLOOM

There’s fire in your heart today
Leaving ashes in its wake
Death feels like an easy friend
A kinder way to mark an end
I’d like to say in confidence
Tomorrow will be different
I have that same dark storm
Whirring inside of me, too
I see it in you
My bloods broken, scarred and
Choking too
A family heirloom
Inside your full heart is a
Child just dying to see
That light set free
Somewhere beyond fear is a
Field full of flowers for you
You’ll find it soon
You’ll find it soon
You’ll find it soon
The ringing in my ears today
Is telling me I’ll never change
Echoes at an empty throne
Are needles in my quiet throat
I’d like to say in confidence
Tomorrow will be different
(Chorus Repeats)
I see you
I feel you
I care for you
I see you
I feel you
I love you

SILENCE

You count on me to be
As quiet as the breeze
Crawling on my knees
And begging pretty please
Silence is a disease I’ve carried
Far too long, too empty
Lacquered all your lavish pity
And what for?
What for?
Don’t count on me to keep your
Secrets safe
Too long I was the mantle
For your pain
Your tongue is tied
In legacies of creeping lies
Shame you didn’t see…
Silence is a disease I’ve carried
Far too long, too empty
Lacquered all your lavish pity
And what for?
What for?
Silence the disease
I carry no longer
I’m not your dog
I’m not your martyr

PAPER CRANE

Amethyst and sage
The birds are out today
Every breath I take is laced with gold
Daffodils will sway
Like trumpets in the rain
Music ever beckoning will grow
I fold my pain like a paper crane
Let it float away, let it float away
I hold my heart like a sweet canary
Like a bowl of cherries,
Like a bowl of cherries
Deep beneath my toes
Is a song my body knows
There’s bread enough for all this broken world
Salt and nectarines
I feel like a tambourine
Music ever beckoning will grow
(chorus repeats)
The road still
Barbed and long
Treacherous and dark
Terrifying
Still sometimes
It’s easier to find
Ways to be blind
More satisfying
But hold your heart like a bowl of cherries
Hold your heart like a sweet canary
Hold your heart like a bowl of cherries
Sing with the wind, the world, the worry
Hold your heart like a bowl of cherries
Hold your heart like a bowl of cherries

NARCISSUS STARES

Narcissus stares
Standing on his throne
You’re the prettiest of all
Everybody knows
Narcissus stares
Shallow in the water
Hands destined to crawl
Back to the slaughter
Solipsistic swine
Claim the hammer of truth
Wield the hammer, it’s fine
‘Till they bring the hammer on you
Narcissus stares
Standing on his throne
You’re the prettiest of all
Wholly alone
Narcissus stares
Fragile in the water
Hand destined to crawl
Back to the slaughter
(Chorus repeats x2)
Hammer Order
Your selfish years
Are over

YOUNG BLOSSOMS IN THE GRAVE

There is no hope, no laughter, no prayer,
No future left to repair for
Young blossoms in the grave
Your hands still clutching the spade
You wear your murder like a crown,
So unashamed
Young blossoms in the grave
A curse on you and your wretched heart
Young blossoms in the grave
Fields of lilies burned and buried
A trail of coffins where a dream should be
There is no hope, no laughter no prayer
No future left to repair for
Young blossoms in the grave
Your hand still herald the cavalcade
You wear your murder like a crown,
So unashamed
Young blossoms in the grave
Fields of lilies burned and buried
A trail of coffins where a dream should be
Blood, Power, Reckless cowards
Cop, Cower, Sick with power
Blood, Power, Reckless cowards
Young blossoms in the grave
Your hands still clutching the spade
Curses, curses
Curses On you tearing worlds apart

BLUEBIRD STILL SINGS

There is a moth inside
Wings wide
Kissing tides
There is a snake in hand
Black and white
Asleep in my spine
In dreams you
Are the wolf who
Drags, growls, bites, claws
Laughing pulls my hands and feet off
In dreams I
Try violently to cry
Nothing makes it out
Just roses and a silent shout
There are bees in my arms
Honeycomb heart
A tongue made sharp
There are birds beneath
Winter trees and
Ripe spring
I open my mouth
Wide as Saturn’s rings
You come tumbling down
Weak as fallen trees
I pull it all out
Roses, birds, snakes
I refuse to drown
In your tidal shame
Dead empires
Thrones built for liars
All for frail, cheap power
Your heart is a coward
Pity
You need me
Now that I’m leaving
A bluebird still sings for me
silver tongue and golden wings
A bluebird still sings for me

ECLOSION

I wanna know
How time made fear from folly
I wanna know
How to tame my melancholy
I wanna know hope
I need change
I need hope I can try for
I need love I can hold on to
I need a smile I can call my home
I wanna know
How the rose dies, still and withered
I wanna know
How the earth blooms out of winter
I wanna know
How the moon shines, just a sliver
I wanna know hope
(chorus repeats)
I need change to break me
I need change to let me go
I need change to teach me
I need change to make me whole
I need change

DOLOS

I can hear death’s door pry
Your poison heart has left me petrified
You are a cancer in me
Cureless, fearful, bound to malignancy
I’m a butterfly in decay
Wing-plucked, pinned down, awake in the grave
I’ve no blood left to give
Yet you drive the knife in
Deeper, Deeper
Prisoner of fear
Certain I will die here
I’m nothing but empty
And empty for nothing
You make it easy to leave
You make it easy to leave
There is nothing I miss
Your poison heart is a curse, a deathwish
You would make a martyr of me
Watch me burn without pause of empathy
I wish I could take back
The years, the trust, the love that was ransacked
You render me worthless, trampled, hopeless
I pray for the grave and believe I deserve it
I’ve no blood left to give
Yet you drive the knife in
Deeper,
Deeper
I’ve no blood left to give
(chorus repeats)